Reality.

When you spend up to eight hours a day in the prayer room, you begin to find out who really are. And I'm not talking about who you may be to the world or through the eyes of man, but being understood and FULLY KNOWN by God. The uncreated God, the Eternal One, the God of the Universe. The Lord of Lords and the King of Kings begins to show you a picture of your heart. He, for what feels like the first time reveals what you look like through His fiery eyes of love and desire.

Here is sort of a skit of how most of my conversations with the Lord have gone so far(after spending time in His presence):
Me: "Wait a second Lord, You who created everything in its splendor...the sun, the moon, the stars, the mountains, waterfalls, and canyons...scans the earth and is instantly drawn to the heart of man. Seriously?"

God: "Yes!"

Me: "But God, really...come on, You made EVERYTHING! So You are telling me You are caught off guard, overtaken, and ravished at the weak heart of man?"

God: "Yes!"

Me: "Well You did create us for Your own pleasure, but we have fallen so short. You are STILL captivated at our attempt to love You with our whole heart? Be completely honest, I want to know the truth!"

God: "Ok Tayla, you want to know the truth. Well here is it...I, the God of EVERYTHING, the Holy of Holies, the All-Knowing One, the Father of all, I am madly in love with you. All I have to do is hear your voice and I am overwhelmed. You are the work of My hands. I am unbelievably overtaken by your weak response to My great love. Just believe it. Walk in My love daughter. How many times must I tell you...if it takes Me reminding you daily, even hourly, I will. Because My heart is ravished by yours, and how I long for you to believe this truth of who I am. I love you. I am married to you. I will never divorce you. I can not be disappointed in you. Just give me what you have, give me your heart...and I am undone."


So, this is where I am at right now.

The Lord is literally breaking me in two with this ridiculous love. He knows I am weak, thats why He remains strong. He remains steady in His pursuit of man. Every time I come close to running away in my shame and unbelief, He chases me down like a daddy runs after his little girl. Every time I hide my face, He declares over me "Return to Me, for I am married to you!" He reminds me of His unfailing love and commitment to my heart. He is not one to abandon the work of His hands.
HE WILL FINISH WHAT HE STARTED.

Yah! Thank you Father of Glory! Unto You be ALL the praise!